I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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