Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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