I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
