i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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