he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
