is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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