this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Randomize
