he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize