your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
