I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
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