My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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