i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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