How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
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