She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
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We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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