remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
