I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
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