We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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