I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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