i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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