What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
