Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
