Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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