i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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