You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Pooping to opera.
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