I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
