Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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