why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i wish my penis had a tongue
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Randomize
