The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Randomize
