that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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