You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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