Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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