Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
