he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
