Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
