This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
