I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
