Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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