the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
