i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Randomize
