areolas are like halos for boobs.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Randomize