You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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