Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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