just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
