I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
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If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
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Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize