i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I will pee on everything he values.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Randomize
