why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
