I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
