Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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