i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize