ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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