he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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